Better on Paper

Comfort in how you cocoon me,
Strength when you stuff me,
Happiness as you fool me,
Tremors after you leave me.

My heartbeat bleats when you’re not a few feet away.
No you leave me anxious—I begin to sway…
With terror in my mind, I fear the worst will arise.
Pure terror fills my thoughts when I ponder our demise.

Without you and I, what else lies?
Only empty space… awaiting a trace of new longing.

I shake and stir,
While you mock and blur my vision—
Crystal clear, with teardrops of fear.

But what if I chose not to care?
To strip my body of your venom and scares?
I’ll drive my car far,
To a place you can’t hurt me—where I refuse to let you irk me.

My mind tries to comply with the truthful lies
I feed myself in place of you.
You fail to treat me—but is it a treat
If I must meet you more than halfway,
In a place where terror pierces my insides,
Drawing them out desperately, with haste?